I emailed the radio station's events manager, asking if there would be any way to get a private area set up, so that "Idol" and my band could have dinner....Somewhere in the message, he lost the"Idol" part, and went into a frontal attack on me and my band, asking if we were too good to eat in public. Then when I politely corrected him, saying this was asked by "Idol" he snapped at me again, and told me he was already setting up hospitality.
Now this is the dilema I face: In my head, I imagine me kicking him in the balls, and asking why a 42 year old man, still feels the need to be an ass hole to women ( which he is pretty notorious for being). Instead of very kindly handling the situation, he felt like I was stepping on his territory, and got pissy.
And the messed up part, is that for a minute, I felt bad, like I had done something wrong and needed to apologize!!! It's like women in the industry have to either be catorgized as bitches or sluts, and we can't just be treated like the intelligent, confident women we are.
I need to take a skin thickening class sometimes, because I know that I should not let people like this bother me. Sometimes though, the sheer ignorance and rudeness of people, just bothers me!
UUUUggggghhhhh!
You & I deal with the same stereotype, very often.. & that is.. a douche bag. Something I constantly have to remind myself is this :
ReplyDelete"this person, at the end of the day, doesn't matter. I am tough, intelligent and awesome, if they can't see that then they are worthless.. and probably miserable."
so.. just remember, let it roll off and you keep doing it how you've always done it. It's worked for this long, right?
These struggles come around more often then not, particularly in this industry. Its almost as if we have to practice daily positive reinforcement for ourselves because of the position we're in, and as much as we'd like to not have to go through this, its at least one of the ways we can all stay sane throughout our careers. i am definitely guilty of, well, feeling guilty when a situation like that happens and i have to immediately correct myself since i really handled the situation the best i could. but g-dawg is right, that manager is probably miserable and taking it out in you, and at the end of the day you know what you did wasn't deserving of that treatment. at least we have each other (even thought i haven't met you all), but its a relief to know you guys are here.
ReplyDeleteAs a non-member of the industry I'm going to give you my adivce from an "outsiders" view. In a world where men have been raised to be a dominant creature, they feel threatened when a woman enters into their "territory" and all of a sudden has authority. Whether or not you have seniority, authority, class or a higher education - you have already lost a sense of credibility for the sheer fact that you have tits and a vagina. Little to his knowledge, the level of class that you portray, the emotion that you posess and the passion that drives you every day grants you with the respect of everyone who can see past those blinders. The bands love you and respect you, your friends wish they could indulge themselves in a day in your life, and your family could never be more proud. I for one am so happy to call you women of the music industry my friends...it's not a matter of tough skin, or harsh come backs...it's class...and baby you got it!
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